The Finest Irony is Accidental

Conservapedia got me high. The irony that can be found here has a purity that can only be produced by people who have no grasp whatsoever of the ironic perspective. While the best satirists can achieve incredible hydroponic heights, the strains that occur spontaneously in nature are staggeringly potent. This blend is laced with some sublime silliness too delightful to properly identify; I took a hit of this thread and by the time I got to the part where Andy Schlafly wrote ‘It takes some getting used to, but I like “Holy Force.” The term may appeal even more to teenagers. It may also gain traction with the physics-students-headed-for-atheism crowd.’ my eyes were red and I was giggling uncontrollobly. It’s some good shit, that’s for sure.

Gentlemen, I concur with both of your assessments, but there is another aspect to this that is actually gratifying for me for this is essentially an admission that their political philosophy and worldview cannot be supported by their stated theology. When I saw what had become of the Gospel of Mark in their hands (consider this sample: Mark 3:6 becomes ‘The Liberals then fled from the scene to plot with Herod’s people against Jesus, and plan how they might destroy him.’ ) I could not help but derive strange satisfaction from such hubristic blasphemies that do nothing but concede that the KJV and other extant translations of the Holy Bible do not support the politics of the far right wing. After years of arguing with conservatives who insisted on both the literal inerrancy of the Bible and immaculate perfection of their political ideology, it is shocking to see this sort of surrender.

Although I certainly have explained the problems of ancient translations and modern vocabulary (consider alone how many more words and concepts we have) to conservatives, I didn’t think they would crack quite like this. Consider; they have gone from thinking that the Bible was the Perfect and Holy Word of G-d to believing it is some kind of intramural squad rulebook that can be altered according to the whims of whoever happens to be holding it at the time. That’s quite a flip-flop, really.

It’s not a good idea to get too literal when thinking about contemporary issues in relation to Jesus. After all, he hung out with tax collectors and lepers; how do you think He really would have felt about the debate over health care? I suppose the folks over at Conservapedia must have finally figured out that you can’t reconcile conservative policies with a book that says ‘And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.”

7 Responses to “The Finest Irony is Accidental”

  1. The Dem’s should hope Jesus is on board with the proposed Health Care Reform. Insuring millions while remaining deficit neutral will take nothing short of a miracle.

    Or tax hikes.

  2. Well, less than a year ago the thought of the Dow hitting 10,000 anytime soon would have seemed miraculous, so there ya go. Actually, I myself had been questioning how insuring millions while remaining deficit neutral would work, but now that I see your doubt my faith is redoubled.

  3. Well, the cost thing is a valid question. Mind you, I’m not completely opposed to a modest tax hike IF I’m actually getting something for it–in this case there’s no single-payer system on the table (sadly), so my expectation would be that I’d be saving more on reduced health insurance premiums based on the competition of the public option(long-term, since they’re gonna get us in the short-term). If my costs do not drop, and I’m still paying more in taxes, I shall be cross.

    But again, at the very least those responsible for it would be accountable to the voters.

  4. Yeah, I’d have no problem paying a tax instead of a premium…

  5. Folks,

    Peace and love be upon you and your families and communities.

    Obama is proposing health INSURANCE reform, which, as Dr. Andrew Weil has pointed out, is only a (necessary) beginning, not “real” health CARE reform. Real health care reform will reduce greed and excess profits from the system.

    Really, capitalism has little or no place in medicine. Rather medicine should be about care, healing, compassion, and altruism (and good science and sound management).

    A culture that forgets true healing, and reduces all human meaning to $$$ motives becomes “sick” on various levels, spiritually, psychologically, politically and economically. Many caring people are repulsed by the “medical systems” pathologies and exploitation of sickness by those seeking to satisfy their greed and arrogant need to achieve success at any and all costs.

    On a practical level, simply opening up the existing greed/ego-based medical system to everyone will cause a massive economic problem. There aren’t enough health care workers to fulfill the need, so it is literally impossible to open the system to everyone in the short run anyway.

    Simply piling more new lies on top of old lies won’t work.

    re: Bible “translations”.

    I agree that the irony is extreme. By way of one explanation:

    Thanks to Rev. Eric Stetson (Universalist, Wash DC) for pointing out that Jesus clearly states that everyone has the potential for reaching the same ultimate level of spirituality (even regardless of religious affiliation) that Jesus did. This contrasts with the conventional/orthodox belief, which insists that prophets/priests control access to Heaven, and only “Christians” can get in.

    Here is what it says in Luke 6:40

    [Luke 6 starts with a discussion of narrow, literal interpretation of previous religious law vs. following the broader spirit of the law. Jesus performs a healing miracle on the Sabbeth and thus offends the priests. He than retreats to pray, and upon returning, addresses his apostles and the masses, praising the downtrodden and oppressed, and warning the fortunate and favored. He says to turn the other cheek, give to the needy, treat others as you would expect to be treated.]


    [6] 39 And He also spoke a parable to them:

    “A blind man cannot guide a blind man, can he? Will they not
    both fall into a pit?

    [6] 40

    “A pupil is not above his teacher; but everyone, after he has
    been fully trained, will be like his teacher. ”
    . . .

    [6] 46

    “Why do you call Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say?
    . . .


    The Vatican’s astronomer observed that many fundamentalists are engineers. they read the bible as if it is a one-dimensional instruction manual, and fail to see the grand metaphors (complexity and depth of meaning).

    George Lakoff (Linguistics, UC Berkeley) sees right wing conservative culture warriors as being inflamed with a pathological need to impose a “strict daddy” archetype (order) on society, and attack-marginalize the (“liberal/left”) archetype of “nurturing mommy”.

    As an integralist, I would hope that both archetypes can, in “healthy” forms, coexist in a complementary relationship. Rejecting other truths is a form of “clinging” (attachment to illusion/false belief), and leads to suffering.

    All consciousness ultimately unfolds at higher and higher levels, to meet the “coherence needs” of culture at a given level of development or evolution (Jean Gebser, Clare Graves). To insist that all of a culture stay at a lower level because of some people’s pathological need for the comfort of a false sense of (lost) order is tragic, and backward.

    All things, old and new, come from an ever-present origin.

    The future lies in the embrace of all truths.

    Adeu amics!
    Eric P.

  6. Eric-
    Very nice. I especially agree with the idea ‘All things, old and new, come from an ever-present origin.’
    Dr. Slappy

  7. Eric-
    It really is an argument of corporate profits vs human life. I’m sorry for the brevity of yesterday’s reply but I was borrowing a laptop from a co-worker while on brief break to just check in. However, I wanted to let you know that I truly appreciated this comment. Whoever you are on the other side of this keyboard, you are a seeker on the path to enlightenment and I’m glad we have encountered each other here in the wild.

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