a case of you

I hung out with Lara last night. The last couple of years haven’t been the best for communication between us to say the least but that’s behind us now. We talked all night and I drank more wine than is my wont but it wasn’t too much. Sushi for dinner, smoking on the balcony. She showed me the World of Warcraft which actually made today’s Penny Arcade even funnier to me. We talked about the movies that make us laugh.  We talked about everything. She asked me if I was in love with Julia and I told her that she makes me feel all shimmery. But I don’t know about being in love. She was looking for more and in pressing me asked me something about when I had been in love last and that may have been the only moment I didn’t really know what to say all night.

Itunes just shuffled up Prince covering Joni’s ‘A Case of You’. I haven’t listened to it since last summer. Sometimes a song can simmer in you for years before you ever truly understand it. I knew ‘Purple Rain’ inside out since Lara gave me the tape for Christmas the year it was the biggest album in the world but it wasn’t until I was much, much older that I really understood the song. Dylan’s ‘Tangled Up in Blue’ didn’t mean much to me until I was around thirty years old. It’s not that the lyrics didn’t make sense, it’s that I didn’t understand the emotional experience that would make someone sing them. I understand ‘A Case of You’ perfectly tonight.

Lara has found a job that really sounds appealing all on it’s own, and it has the added benefit of being in Vermont so she can take her relationship with Gordon to the next level. This city will become a little colder and less beautiful for her absence, but it will abide. A few weeks ago, Julia was hanging out with me and some of the Port Awesome crew while we swapped stories and laughs for an evening. When it was over she said she wanted friends like I have; friends you share a deep history with, who remember you through all of your mutations and adaptations and still love you for who you are. Of all my friends, Lara certainly fits this description perfectly.

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