Debriefing Whitey

A Brief For Whitey by Patrick J Buchannan

Mr. Buchannan has delivered unto us a startlingly clear distillation of the ignorance that fuels the ugly racism that drives his ideology. I present it here complete but with my marginalia included.

PJB: A Brief for Whitey

(For some reason I am hungry for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right now. Excuse me while I go make one.)

By Patrick J Buchanan
How would he pull it off? I wondered.
(This is one good &^*%ing sandwich. I use creamy peanut butter that I keep in the fridge. I like it cool.)  

How would Barack explain to his press groupies why he sat silent in a pew for 20 years as the Rev. Jeremiah Wright delivered racist rants against white America for our maligning of Fidel and Gadhafi, and inventing AIDS to infect and kill black people?
(Yeah, everybody knows God sent AIDS to punish gay people, right, Pat? Duh. And I guess you’re familiar enough with racists rants to know one when you hear them. Kids, this is what happens when you totally lack irony in your mental diet.)

How would he justify not walking out as Wright spewed his venom about “the U.S. of K.K.K. America,” and howled, “God damn America!”

(Speaking as someone who actually has walked out of a lecture in a similar circumstance, I must also note that I have often sat through many other offensive and obnoxious presentations, to say nothing of many boring ones. I must also say that I am not offended by the Reverend Wright’s comments. The KKK was a very real terrorist group that killed, intimitated and commited myriad crimes against American citizens that was allowed to operate unfettered for quite a long time. They still do actually operate but now the government treats them like the criminals they are. However, there’s still a lot of anger about them and the fact that former KKK members have still managed to get elected to political office. Remember, the KKK has killed far more Americans than Al Qaida ever has, and America never declared war on them. Lots of people have said things like ‘God Damn America’ over the years. Pat Robertson joked about nuking the State Department. I haven’t heard you repudiate him for his unpatriotic radicalism.)  

My hunch was right. Barack would turn the tables.
(You mean he didn’t repudiate his pastor to score easy political points with people like you? Good for him.)

Yes, Barack agreed, Wright’s statements were “controversial,” and “divisive,” and “racially charged,” reflecting a “distorted view of America.”
(Seems accurate to me. Actually, they could be applied to your entire essay if one were being charitable. The words I would choose would be more like ‘&%!+’, ‘%$#*&%$$#’ and ‘irredeemable #$&*!^#$’.)

But we must understand the man in full and the black experience out of which the Rev. Wright came: 350 years of slavery and segregation.
(Here it comes. Damn, this is a good sammich.)

Barack then listed black grievances and informed us what white America must do to close the racial divide and heal the country.
(Sounds good to me.)

The “white community,” said Barack, must start “acknowledging that what ails the African-American community does not just exist in the minds of black people; that the legacy of discrimination — and current incidents of discrimination, while less overt than in the past — are real and must be addressed. Not just with words, but with deeds … .”
(Absolutely. Racism is real. Discrimination exists. Conservatives want to ignore race.)

And what deeds must we perform to heal ourselves and our country?
(I goh peahnuh buddah stuck on da roof of mah mouf.)

The “white community” must invest more money in black schools and communities, enforce civil rights laws, ensure fairness in the criminal justice system and provide this generation of blacks with “ladders of opportunity” that were “unavailable” to Barack’s and the Rev. Wright’s generations.
(That sounds entirely reasonable and appropriate to me.)

What is wrong with Barack’s prognosis and Barack’s cure?
(Oh, do tell, Pat Buchanan. Let it all out.)

Only this. It is the same old con, the same old shakedown that black hustlers have been running since the Kerner Commission blamed the riots in Harlem, Watts, Newark, Detroit and a hundred other cities on, as Nixon put it, “everybody but the rioters themselves.”
(I see. Barack Obama is a zoot-suited three-card monte operator. The Kerner Commision, which acknowledged the role that racism played in the physical and economic segregation that ‘ghettoized’ Black America, forgot to blame the blacks for being angry. It’s a good thing that you’re not a racist ranting about the lost battles of your youth.)

Was “white racism” really responsible for those black men looting auto dealerships and liquor stories, and burning down their own communities, as Otto Kerner said — that liberal icon until the feds put him away for bribery.
(Then what was it, o brilliant mind? It’s interesting that you note the auto dealerships and liquor stores specifically. Also, there were many other people than Otto Kerner who came to that conclusion, though you cherry pick his name to discredit the entire commission. So, what was it? What is it you’re really trying to say? Please tell me, because I just can’t figure out your subtle codes.)

Barack says we need to have a conversation about race in America.
(What you need is a lecture. We’ve heard more than enough from you over the years.)

Fair enough. But this time, it has to be a two-way conversation. White America needs to be heard from, not just lectured to.
(How much wax do you have in those hairy old ears? We have heard what you have to say. You advised Nixon that “integration of blacks and whites — but even more so, poor and well-to-do — is less likely to result in accommodation than it is in perpetual friction, as the incapable are placed consciously by government side by side with the capable.” We know how nostalgic you are for the segregation of the 40’s and 50’s: “There were no politics to polarize us then, to magnify every slight. The ‘negroes’ of Washington had their public schools, restaurants, bars, movie houses, playgrounds and churches; and we had ours.” Yes, I think you have made yourself abundantly clear over the years.) 

This time, the Silent Majority needs to have its convictions, grievances and demands heard. And among them are these:
(Nothing can shut up the Silent Majority. Isn’t it astonishing how Pat Buchanan has decreed that he does not only speak for himself, but a Majority that cannot speak for itself. That takes a special kind of ballsy ignorant self-delusion.)

First, America has been the best country on earth for black folks. It was here that 600,000 black people, brought from Africa in slave ships, grew into a community of 40 million, were introduced to Christian salvation, and reached the greatest levels of freedom and prosperity blacks have ever known.
(Wow. I mean, wow. That’s bitter. It would be insane to expect anyone to swallow that. That’s a turd sandwich with a rusty nail garnish. Grandpa Hatey has lost his tiny little mind.)

Wright ought to go down on his knees and thank God he is an American.
(Do you mean an American with freedom of expression and religious affiliation?) 

Second, no people anywhere has done more to lift up blacks than white Americans. Untold trillions have been spent since the ’60s on welfare, food stamps, rent supplements, Section 8 housing, Pell grants, student loans, legal services, Medicaid, Earned Income Tax Credits and poverty programs designed to bring the African-American community into the mainstream.
(It’s not like those things are for African-Americans exclusively. Everyone gets those services, the majority of whom are white. What Grandpa Hatey is saying is that Black people should be grateful for being allowed citizenship.)

Governments, businesses and colleges have engaged in discrimination against white folks — with affirmative action, contract set-asides and quotas — to advance black applicants over white applicants.
(Quotas are illegal. There are no quotas. Conservatives squawk about non-existent ‘quotas’ because they sound like an appropriately un-American strawman. It’s a rhetorical tactic to paint affirmative action programs as backwardly socialist. White people have not lost economic or educational opportunity because of affirmative action.)

Churches, foundations, civic groups, schools and individuals all over America have donated time and money to support soup kitchens, adult education, day care, retirement and nursing homes for blacks.
(See the above note regarding government social programs. Everyone has given and recieved charity. This includes the Irish.)

We hear the grievances. Where is the gratitude?
(Thank you, Grandpa Hatey, for opposing Civil Rights every bloody inch of the way. Thank you for publishing FBI smears of Dr. King as your own editorials. Thank you for trying to justify Aparthied in South Africa as late as 1990 by arguing against the notion that “white rule of a black majority is inherently wrong. Where did we get that idea? The Founding Fathers did not believe this.” Thank you so very much.)

Barack talks about new “ladders of opportunity” for blacks.
(Which I’m sure you’d be happy to kick down.)

Let him go to Altoona and Johnstown, and ask the white kids in Catholic schools how many were visited lately by Ivy League recruiters handing out scholarships for “deserving” white kids.
(If those ‘deserving’ white kids play a sport well, are a talented performer, or achieve academically they are very likely to be recruited by excellent universities.)

Is white America really responsible for the fact that the crime and incarceration rates for African-Americans are seven times those of white America? Is it really white America’s fault that illegitimacy in the African-American community has hit 70 percent and the black dropout rate from high schools in some cities has reached 50 percent?
(When the judges and juries are mostly white, then, yeah, they are kind of the ones responsible. If the cops making the arrests and the DA’s pursuing the cases are primarily white, then, yeah, they are the ones responsible. A white kid in the suburbs and a black kid in the city caught with the same amount of cocaine are looking at two different outcomes. One of them is going to get rehab, counseling, and several second chances. One of them is going to be tried as an adult. Take a wild guess as to which is which.)

Is that the fault of white America or, first and foremost, a failure of the black community itself?
(When one considers all of the sabotage the black community has suffered, and then considers that the man writing the above words has personally participated in that sabotage, well… words fail me.)

As for racism, its ugliest manifestation is in interracial crime, and especially interracial crimes of violence. Is Barack Obama aware that while white criminals choose black victims 3 percent of the time, black criminals choose white victims 45 percent of the time?
(A highly provocative statistic that fails to take into account that over %80 of the population is white and roughly %12 of the population is black. Taken out of context, statistics give a deranged view of the world. For example, white people are far more likely than black people to murder their coworkers, murder their rape victims, murder their children, murder their elderly relatives, and even more likely to kill in a gang conflict. Explain that, white boy. In any case, %86 of whites were killed by whites, and %94 of blacks were killed by blacks. Is that a less alarming way to look at the same thing?)

Is Barack aware that black-on-white rapes are 100 times more common than the reverse, that black-on-white robberies were 139 times as common in the first three years of this decade as the reverse? (Again, Grandpa Hatey is playing games with statistics. For white victims, the statistics show that there is a %44 chance the rapist is white, %33 the rapist is black, and a %19 chance the rapist is ‘other’. The biggest problem with any of these statistics is that rape is an underreported crime and simultaneously a crime that is more likely to generate a false accusation than, say, burglary. There are far deeper human issues than race at work here.)

We have all heard ad nauseam from the Rev. Al about Tawana Brawley, the Duke rape case and Jena. And all turned out to be hoaxes. But about the epidemic of black assaults on whites that are real, we hear nothing.
(How was Jena a ‘hoax’? And what epidemic is Grandpa Hatey rambling about? Violent crime overall is way down from where it used to be.) 

Sorry, Barack, some of us have heard it all before, about 40 years and 40 trillion tax dollars ago.
(Sorry, Grandpa Hatey, some of us have heard it all from you for the last 40 years. You were wrong to spread Hoover’s slanders about Dr. King then, and you’re just as wrong now.)

4 Responses to “Debriefing Whitey”

  1. Yeah… why is he still living? Why is he still talking?!?

  2. Grandpa Hatey is one of those elder statesmen of the conservative movement. Those guys never seem to shut up.

  3. I hate Pat Buchanan.

  4. Akil-
    It is better to love than hate, and Grandpa Hatey thrives on the hate that comes back to him. It confirms his worst paranoid fears and justifies his irrational bigotry. The best thing to do is to laugh at what he says and stop treating him like ‘a’ list punditry. Anything he says cannot be taken seriously. Thank you for your comment.

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